Emotional at my workplace, which means I am

Emotional Intelligence Paper

Emotional intelligence is expressed in many
ways, shapes, and forms. The bottom line is that high emotional intelligence is
a crucial set of skills needed to succeed in life and be happy. In the
following paragraphs I will assess my emotional intelligence based off four
categories: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness and relationship
management.

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To begin, I would rate my self-awareness as
good. I regularly remind myself of all my positive qualities to keep my
confidence up. I recognize and address how my behavior can and does affect
others. A relatable example is when my mother frequently nags me about taking
naps. I do not get upset with her and yell at her to buzz off. Instead, I try
to think of it as she does not want me ruining that night’s sleep. Changing my
perception of the situation from negative to positive, makes me adjust my
behavior and how I will react. In addition, I am aware of my emotional state no
matter how I behave. Sometimes I may snap at my sister for borrowing my shirt,
or feel hopeless I have 2 tests and a paper due on the same day. However, at
the end of the day I realize how and why I felt that way and I will either talk
about it or apologize for it. The reason I did not rate myself very good
because there is an aspect of self-awareness that I am not the best at. I let
others influence my emotional state without realizing. An example of this would
be when I am at work, I am a lead server at a burger restaurant. Being a
server, customers can be extremely rude and disrespectful, and sometimes I do
let it get to me. So, if there was one thing I could improve, it would be not
letting others influence my emotions.

 

The second category I will be rating myself
in is self-management. I would rate myself in this category as very good for several
reasons. I am a great team-player, and enjoy working with others even when
conflict does arise. As mentioned before I am a lead server at my workplace,
which means I am constantly dealing with other servers, hostesses, cooks, and
customers. When conflicts arise, I am the person who resolves the conflict.
Having this job has helped me improve my cooperation and conflict resolution
skills immensely. Additionally, I am awesome at listening to others, and
empathizing with them. My friends are constantly asking me for advice, or just
to vent because I prefer to listen and make them feel better opposed to
insulting and criticizing them. As for the stress portion of self-management, I
am comfortable with stress. I know what stresses me out, and what I should do
to cope with stress. I am very aware of what activities help me to relieve
stress, and I regularly perform those to reduce my stress levels. A few examples
of things I do regularly to reduce my overall stress levels are: taking a bath,
getting a massage, meditating, listening to music and hiking.  

 

The third category is social awareness, I
am giving myself a rating of good because I am relatively average in this
category. I am a great listener, my friends, and coworkers always ask me for
advice, or ask just to vent to me when they are upset. I always try to show
people the positive aspect of their situations. In addition, I am respectful of
other people’s opinions and thoughts, which is why in high school, people
always liked completing group projects with me. Another example is from when I
was in high school, my teacher put me in charge of organizing the Terry Fox Run.
She really liked how I incorporated everyone’s ideas into the run and did not
exclude anyone from the planning.

The fourth category is relationship
management, and I am giving myself a rating of very good, as I am great at
forming and maintaining relationships. An example of this is that I have been
in a relationship with my boyfriend for two and a half years. We are constantly
improving our relationship by communicating more, appreciating, respecting, and
most importantly taking care of each other. We sometimes fight, and it is
normal and okay to do so, on the grounds that we deal with it appropriately and
respectfully. I am open and comfortable with my family, and knowing who and
what matters to me in life. I am continuously making time for those who matter
to me, and spending quality time with each one of them. An example of this is
that every Sunday afternoon, my family and I enjoy a home cooked meal at the
dinner table, and play board games afterwards. This may not seem like a big
deal to other people. However, to my family those are some of the fondest
moments we share with each other.

 

 There
are two emotional intelligences tests I took to compare the results from to my assessment,
discussed above. The
first test I took wasAM1  from memorado.ca and I will summarize the results yielded. The
results from test one described that I deal with emotions and different
personalities easily, and that I trust my judgement. The results stated that I
can perceive people’s feelings accurately and that I am a likeable friend and
colleague because of my social skills. Test one results concluded that I am
good at working both individually and as a team player. Comparing the first
test to my own assessment of my emotional intelligence, they were quite
similar. Both displayed that I am excellent in the self-awareness and
self-management portion of emotional intelligence. The second test I took AM2 was from ihhp.com, and the results stated that I have high emotional
intelligence. The results go on to say that I strive to reach my goals, by
being persistent and driven. However, the test results state I need to take
time to stop and reflect on what is most important to me in life. Comparing
these test results to my assessment show that I can sometimes work too hard,
and lose sight of my key values in life. This is something I did not know I
lacked in, nor that I should improve. This test made me realize that there are
things we do that we are unaware of and sometimes we need an outside source to bring
those things to the surface. To conclude, comparing both tests to my
assessment, there were no major differences. For the most part they all yielded
the same results, that I had high emotional intelligence.

 

Despite having a
high emotional intelligence, there are always things to improve. For example, I
need to work on letting others influence my emotions, which was previously mentioned.
I tend to let other people get under my skin without realizing it, this falls
under the category of self-awareness. One specific way I can improve this is
taking what other people say with a grain of salt, and just being confident in
who I am. The next time a customer is rude to me, as opposed to taking it
personally I will tell myself that I am great at my job, and it is absolutely
not my fault they have no manners. The second specific way I can improve is to
stop surrounding myself with people who upset me, and put me down. Before, a friend
could insult me, and I would be sad for the rest of night, now I know not to go
out with that person next time. In addition, another improvement I could make,
this time under the social awareness category would be not letting people take
advantage of me. I can be too nice for my own good and sometimes I put effort
into people who are not worth even a second of my time. I know I can improve
this by toughening up and realizing not everybody in the world is good. I need
to recognize who is worth my time, and focus my effort on them. The last
improvement I can make falls under self-management, and it is the ability to
deal with stress. As mentioned above, my ability to work under pressure is exceptional
and stress drives me to succeed. However, being a university student brings on
a lot of stress in many forms. There are certain things I do that may not be
the best coping mechanisms such as staying up until two or three o’clock in the
morning and waking up at six every day for school. This is one of my biggest
challenges because the lack of sleep, can affect my mood negatively. For the
most part it does not affect me, but close to the end of the week I may get a
little grumpy and irritated because of the amount of stress I have. I think
that if I stuck to a firm sleep schedule, I would have more energy and
experience less mood swings. Another way I can improve my sleep schedule is not
working during the week. I find working during the week interrupts my sleep
patterns. If I switched my weekday shifts to weekend only, I might have a
better chance at getting a good night’s sleep.

 

To conclude, after
assessing myself, taking two different emotional intelligence tests and, comparing
the two, I think I have a better and deeper understanding of my strengths and
weaknesses. I know what skills I should utilize as well as what skills I should
improve, and how to improve them practically. I can recognize these qualities
in others, which can help me surround myself with people who are positive and
motivating. Striving for a perfect emotional intelligence all the time is
impossible because everybody makes mistakes, and everybody has those days. However, as long I have a perfect
emotional intelligence ninety percent of the time, I am totally fine with that.